• an academic journey
• a cultural journey
• an intellectual journey
• and an emotional journey

Next to these categories you can of course still read every post from start to end. And also, read my report for the HKU (although it is in Dutch).

Thanks for being an audience. Although there weren’t that many reactions on the blogg itself, I got a lot ‘offline’. All supported me and learned me new stuff. Thanks for that :) Frida recently told that a friend of her was following both our blogs with a feeling of inspiration. That was really wonderful to hear. I hope it was interesting. For me it helped a lot to write things down. And it was an easy way to update the people ‘back home’ :)

For now I stop this blogg I think. I don’t have the need for it that much anymore. It is something I did when traveling. The posts from this blogg will go to an archived place on my website to which I will link from here. And one day I will have another blog of another travel; which for sure, will come :)

One thing to close, the tips I wrote in my report for HKU for other traveling students.

“The tourist sees what he came to see. The traveler sees what he sees.”

Go without too much preconceptions, look at the world like it is and remember, that how different people may be, the country is not in a crisis, so apparently, their way of working works fine too.*

Culture is so much more than just ‘fine-art’ culture. It’s how people act and think. Which structures are being made, what people think is normal, what things they completely overlook because they never do that kind of things and how close you are with people. If you’re starting to see that, you’ll ’see’ a lot more. If you hold on to the glasses of conclusions and preconceptions you actually are holding on to your own culture which makes it a lot harder to learn from the other culture.

* Which says something interesting about countries being in a crisis right now :)

He wanted to see the museum für film und fernseher (movie and television). The exhibition was not that interesting to me, but the building was pretty interesting, and there were some other nice things.

Then we went to the museum of communication. It had some nice things, good interaction as well, but it was too bad that most descriptions and explanations were only in German. And a nice thought on diaries and blogs. Are the diaries of today (the weblogs) still as private as they were? And, is there a difference between how the writers and readers see that privacy?

In the evening we went to a vegetarian Japanese restaurant. I found one before, and, it seemed to be a very good choice. Masa said it was so good that they could easily open a shop in Japan as well :) And he was really happy reading some Japanese again (on the menu) after three weeks of Europe trip. The restaurant was called Susuru, which means slurping. It was advised to do that as, according to the menu, it made for a better taste. And, it was good anyway to be able to eat the udon, a special kind of noodles. And, really tasty it was! You should go there when you’re in Berlin!

I’ve been thinking about Frida all day.. Only three days ago now.

Next stop, Tournus. The train leaves in an hour. For a week with Mens en Spirit (human and spirit).

There can be no understanding between the hands and the brain unless the heart acts as mediator (Thea von Harbou)

And then I saw this, here in Berlin. Wikitravel calls this neighborhood one with students, artists and left-wing people. The streets are big, large apartments, people on the streets everywhere. In the shopping street there are all these small shops. Goods from all over the world, people from all cultures. Semi-old style buildings, open windows, music and talking coming through them. Whole gardens on the balconies. People smiling, even if they don’t know you. A very alive atmosphere.

Not houses with plants growing on the walls, but whole cars and bikes covered with plants! A student house, Chateau Manteuffel, named after the street, where the students had set up their own dream organization as well. Living, working, partying, together, in the same place.

The park and playground in the middle had a complete biological market. At first I thought “that is a waste of energy, two bio grocery stands opposite each other”. But then everything was bio. Three groceries, two cheese stands, a bakery, five clothing stands, a shoe stand, two with household stuff and an ice cream stand! Oh, ad one with flowers and one with juice and wine. I’ve probably forgot some more :)

At the playgrounds the mothers and some fathers were talking and watching their children. The women, about half of them, without bras. No limitations for the body anymore? When the children couldn’t make up who’s turn it was now, one of the mothers took care of it. In a perfect and calm way. As if every child was her child. No need for a “how to raise your child” reality tv show here, no “I only care about my own child” mentality.

In the evening I ate at the vegetarian restaurant next to the park. Really good food, nice juice (rhubarb!) and not expensive. In the whole neighborhood I found five bio shops, a vegetarian café and this vegetarian restaurant. And I’ve only spent half a day there. The closest bio shops in Eskilstuna were an hour and a half away by train.

I knew it can be like this. In Alkmaar we also had three bio shops. I’ve seen such streets and atmosphere in The Hague before. In Eskilstuna there were also always people talking and children playing in front of the apartment.

But somewhere, I forgot this longing. To have all this, all around you. I forgot, while knowing it unconsciously, that I wish to live in such a place.

—

Update: I’ve uploaded some photos

I really have to get used to the new place, changing my habits. I already can’t count the times I’ve said “tack” (thanks in Swedish) and “hej”.. Here “guten Morgen” is more used by “the local people” :)

Apparently, the Germans don’t really trust the Swedes. The EuroNight from Malmö to Berlin goes, unexpected by me, on a ferry, and skips all Denmark’s islands. At the harbor, half an hour under Malmö, we stopped. Since our departure from Malmö our tickets were checked by a conductor from SJ (the Swedish railway company). During the stop, two conductors walked by the train, spoke a bit about which wagons they already checked and then the second conductor came in and started checking tickets.. Then I noticed his name tag, Deutsche Bahn.

Further everything went nice. I met a nice guy from Japan, doing a roundtrip through Europe. It was a good way to talk about (and verify) the things I learned about Japanese culture in the last half year. It is strange to hear that it is really true that they have about 5 vacation days a year. Officially more in the better companies, but nobody dares to take them because they get looked upon by their co-workers. Co-workers, or indeed their group members. Because he said it was true that they were more group oriented than individualistic. But how this was in reality was hard to tell.. I guess you have to experience that for yourself. And he said that these restaurants “you have here” is something unseen in Japan. In Japan, restaurants are standing restaurants. You eat diner in 5 minutes. I told that it may be because when we go out for food (which is more expensive) we want to make sure that it was worth the money, so we stay longer and enjoy the good time there. But in Japan eating out was not that much more expensive he said. Still, even at home, I take some 20 to 30 minutes for a casual day diner. He is going to stay in Berlin for some days as well, so we decided to meet tomorrow morning at the Hauptbahnhof, so go in the city together.

I can now go back to the central station to pick up my reservation for the CityNightLine towards Basel (on my way to France). I picked up the original reservation this morning already, but then the date was wrong. Luckily they could provide me with a new reservation right away.

So, off from the computer, into the city, now that I have my new ticket :)

Why is Berlin so far from Eskilstuna? I want to be closer to you Frida.

Eldflugor och Odågor (picture from eldflugor.se)

There was a concert last Sunday were I went with Frida. It was from 6 girls, Google Translate said they called themselves Firefox and Waster (Eldflugor och Odågor), singing songs, mostly a cappella, some with addition of drums.

Most of the songs were in Swedish so I didn’t understand the words, but I could understand the feeling sometimes. A bit like Evelyn Glennie showed on TED.

It also was a great place there, good atmosphere. I think it was a living and working community (is that a correct term in English?). And there was a ecological shop in this building, finally with really good goods. Too bad it is in Uppsala which costs about €30,- to travel to..

It was great to travel this whole day. Although not as far as Nikki is traveling, I finally see some other places then only Eskilstuna and Västerås. And also that the good day is more than the goal your going to (the concert), it is also the travel, the things you see, the talks you have, what you think about..

On the way back there was this flyer on the streets of Uppsala. Some flyer from the International Womans Day. On the front it had a quote:

“Det är tur att vi finns, men det är en skam att vi behövs!”

I, apparently with my cultural background, read something like ‘man are scum and we behave’. Ohoh, don’t read that! Too late :) Not, it was more something like ‘it is good that we exist, but a shame that we are needed!’, about the womans organization behind this flyer.

Now we have to write a paper about being a leader in an organization leading the organization for change. In the end I chose the organization to be my own, the company I want to create. Not the easiest one, but good to start the development on that one. So I have to find out what kind of leader I want to be. I feel that at the moment I’m more a personal leader, leading myself. Which is actually perfect, though not for this paper :)

But, just do! So, I’ve writen a sort of history describing my fictional company. I can design the whole thing, how things work, what kind of people there are, etc. Nice! Today I had a follow-up with the teacher. She helped me in reframing the ‘problem’ (as we need to have a problem to be able to change the organization). And we came to a conclusion on how where it was. I’m going to write about a network of people who are working together and now some want to create a company out of this. How to lead this group in this transition? The transition in the practicle side, but more on the personal side. What about the people who don’t want the company? How will it influence the atmosphere?

Interesting process :)

It was good to be in a project again. Very different from the project at the HKU. First of all because we had a group of four ‘leaders’. But also because we had a week for the whole project and it was hard to make a good separation of the tasks. Then it becomes more of a problem that we’re all leaders, because we were for example all responsible for the documentation, all responsible for the presentation, all responsible for the research.. Good learning moments. Also I finally experimented with putting together a presentation with my knowledge from the last years of interaction design. Thinking about every step, what to do, what effect it has, what do I want this step to lead to, etc.

Since my time experiments of the last weeks I’ve been trying to slow down more. But interesting enough my frustration inside the group came from me going to fast. Though I thought that this friction with other people’s time might be the hardest, it was not the first problem I encountered. The first difficult thing was that – much more than I thought – time was enclosed in my personal culture. How this striving for being in time is in every task I preformed. Wanting to finish something instead of going for quality. Going for quality also suits me way more, but actually doing it is step two.

—

Well, we thought it was less social. During the experiment we held at our presentation the observing group noted that the group with the large bags was more social because they ate less. Of course not counting for the right environment and group differences, but still.

When I got home I thought about how we give compliments to each other – sorry, the introduction has hardly any relation with the following I think. When you’ve worked together with someone and you like the way the other did something you say, “you’re good at .. communicating” for example. I’m brought up by my environment to reply with “thanks”, but I never really adapted to that, always found it a bit strange. I mostly mumbled something like “yeah” or “ok”. Then after some time people around me started saying that I should learn to receive compliments. Now I suddenly knew why I never got around that, why it feels strange to do so.

It is not something I can be thankful for. It is just something I do, something I’m capable of. If someone says that I did something well then that is more a thing someone else notices which for me is already clear, is a normal way of life.
And I also thought this might very well be related to the individualistic culture we grow up with in the west. A culture where personal achievements lead to a higher status, to getting a job, to performing well in society. This makes that when somebody tells you that you’ve done something good, you thank them because they, so to say, ‘gave’ you an achievement. Because the people around you attribute things to you, you climb up the social ladder, you do or don’t get the job.

Something I never could understand. I do understand why now, but I still don’t like it.

– I went to get something to drink –

Ah, now I also now what the relation with the introduction is. Nice how this getting out is helping you to remember things.

Before we went out for a walk I put my backpack in my apartment because I just came from the university. I showed my apartment and she said something like that it was nice. I think I answered with “yes”. At that moment I thought about this getting ‘compliments’. The nice apartment to me was also just something normal. Of course it is something that I created and thus something that someone can compliment me on, but still it is just who I am, what I create around me.

To I met St. Eskil, see him on the right. This saint founded the tuna (a Swedish name for a village).

First I would pronounce Eskilstuna without much emphasis. But now I know to lay the emphasis on the E and the a. And to in someway pronounce it as Eskil’s tuna, which is hard :)

And I need more pictures! Yesterday I was at the Eskilstuna’s campus of the university and found this place with the nice lights.

Mälardalen university, Eskilstuna's campus

At the end of the lecture I invited everyone to take one of the tomato pies I had been making. I told it was common in my culture to bring some snacks with when you’re celebrating your birthday (my actual birthday is tomorrow). So that got some talk going about celebrating your birthday in different cultures.

When I grabbed my coat and looked back at the group, I suddenly noticed everyone was just hanging around and having a nice chat while they were eating. Nothing weird, people hanging around for a while and enjoying a nice conversation, but I just didn’t expected it for some reason.

So I, not in any hurry, left my coat and joined the conversations. But as I later realized it probably was already too late. Grabbing my coat in the first place was enough non-verbal communication and the conversations soon stopped and everybody took its own way again :)

—

For tomorrow I invited some people for a housewarming. Some have replied they can’t come, but most haven’t replied yet. Now I’m wondering if this is common in this culture.. Will they now suddenly show up tomorrow?

Well, I think I’ll go out tomorrow and explore some of the forests around – I have a bike (cykel) now! After I got the bike I already ended up in the forest per accident :) The distances are very short here, or is it the map with a different scale to what I’m used to?

What I particularly liked was that it came clear that stereotypes are not always negative, in fact stereotypes are mostly positive when your talking about your own country, or, as I mentioned, about the country you’d like to be a part of..

And Jonas (the teacher) told about turn taking in conversations. When a French speaks with a Swede the French will be talking all the time as she waits for the Swede to interrupt, which they would never do. Ending up with a repeating French because she will think the Swede didn’t understood and a irritated Swede because he thinks the French won’t let him speak.

As the book I’m reading (Communicating with strangers) says:

In a familiar world, people life through the day by responding to daily routine without questioning or reflection. To strangers, however, every situation is new and is therefore experienced as a crisis.

Parrillo (1980) about Schuetz.

A short view of my apartment:

This evening we had the welcoming diner. They divided us into groups, we had to sit at certain places, it was an awkward situation. At my table the conversation didn’t really came to life. Most of the time – after some first introduction talks – we looked away, to other things, tables. Was it my dummy on the table? That got some conversations started though. Were we all thinking of talking to that person at the other table? Or the few empty chairs at our table which created some physical gaps? Or the lagom?

There also was a Swedish fashion show, with the royal family, miss IKEA and ABBA. Speaking of which, ABBA music was played all through the dinner :) Oh, and I got to wear a kind of ‘Jewish badge’; I got a pink paper for the (student) restaurant staff stating ‘Vegetarian’.

Courses here are non parallel, so we only have one course at the time. Thats for the next 5 weeks and then comes the next course. Some exceptions, but then you probably won’t have more then 2 courses at the same time.

Elaborations on the question above after the beeb :)

I think culture does ‘distort’ your view of reality. I think we can never take off those cultural glasses. The culture you grown up with will always influence the way you look at the world. You certainly can learn to understand other cultures and the way other people act. But the ways you communicate, the ways you think etc., are so much burned into you life. Like walking, it happens in your unconsciousness and you’ll never forget it.

Another interesting question to think about: “how much should a society tolerate / accept in terms of cultural differences?” I think this one is especcially for the current situation in the Netherlands (well, the situation when I left the country anyway ;)). What are the effects of other cultures joining your culture?

But, they don’t have vegetarian products here :(

Even the expensive supermarket – comparable with Albert Heijn in size, service, looks, prices – only has óne vegetarian burger. Further, bio shops (or how do you call a ‘natuur(voedings)winkel’ in English?) don’t exist here. Today I came past some shop selling ‘natural’ shoes and some Weleda products. They had a few vegetarian product, but no full range either. And ecological products aren’t that recognizeble as in the Netherlands, there’s no rule of marking things green, you just have to read product listings, which is not that easy.

Also, bread seems not really to exist here. They have lots of knäckebröd, of course. But I thought normal bread wasn’t that rare. It is though.

So, thats Lode on a diet :)

Oh, one great thing is that the local supermarket is open until 22.00 and not that far away, most of the time getting there is spent in walking down the stairs of my flat – 6 in total.

He told a story about a Japanese exchange student at Mälardalen who went on the bus. The bus was empty except for the driver and one other person. She went to sit next to the other person and later at school described how the person next to her was rather scared of her. Just as in the Netherlands – and many other countries I guess – the Swedes will pick the chair most far away from the other people. And here it might be more a case of ‘lagom’.

A new word he learned us was ‘lagom’. Swedish don’t take too much of it, but also not to less. Just about enough. Lagom means that you don’t take the space of someone else, don’t take up too much space for yourself, don’t eat to much at a party, just enough.

Yesterday afternoon we also got our first – well, mine at least – fika. Swedish coffee with a bisquit. I gave the coffee a fair try (I never drink it actually), but quickly switched back to tea again. But the fika itself is nice as it is more than only coffee (/ tea). It is a source for new ideas one said. I compare it a bit with the ‘retreat’ I do as an (interaction) designer; when you start doing something else – take the train, walk at the beach – thén, the ideas get born. And the fika is then also about meeting people, which get your mind thinking about things you normally didn’t thought of.

The first day at the university was nice. Although the presentations were not that interesting when you had read some documents of the universities web site before. The air is rather expensive here and they have a very nice interactive story of images on the wall here, which always ends with death though.

The academic system is really like the Montessori and the system of the HKU I know; a lot of responsibility is laid at the student with max. 10 contact hours per week, the rest is self study. By the way, I saw a Montessori (high)school here yesterday!

The Swedes are on time. Actually it is really funny to notice that this is the first time ever that at a school or conference we haven’t got a delay in the schedule. Instead, we’re ahead of the schedule!

The train trip from Eskilstuna (apartment) to Västerås (university) is very nice. I’m very happy with my choise of staying in Eskilstuna while studying in Västerås. Especially as I have much extra time after the train arrives and before the course starts.